Sometimes life has a funny way of presenting us with the clearest awareness. We sail through life on unexpected waves with wind patterns that shift our direction at any given moment, forcing us to hold on and to navigate the storms or clear blue skies that await. Sometimes when we invest the absolute best pieces of ourselves into the unknown, into dreams that may never transpire, we begin to ache on the inside.
People often spend years within one-sided relationships, abusive situations that ignite at the drop of a dime. Some people choose to compromise their joy for security and companionship, people lie, cheat, steal and deceive, but time and time again, partners turn a blind eye or choose to continually accept the unhealthy, dishonest things taking place. Why? That is the million dollar question. All individual situations are different and everyone has their reasons.
When someone chooses to remain within unfulfilling relationships, they accept less than what they are worth, for whatever personal reason(s) they validate and accept as being kosher for themselves. Sometimes having a warm body to fill space feels better to a person than being alone or having to start over. Sometimes obligation, vows, children or a deep love for another person, but not knowing how to love or how to express oneself, keeps abusive cycles spiraling out of control. People often love one another, they just have deep-rooted unresolved issues causing deep disconnection over and over again.
When two people deeply love and authentically respect one another, it's obvious. It radiates throughout rooms, in public, it follows them wherever they go. It doesn't have to be boisterous or overly expressive, it's the connection that two people share. Thoughtfulness permeates, it regularly sets the stage for everything yet to follow. Selfless behavior and kind consideration exist at the root, through thick and thin. Coping mechanisms continue to care about the other person's thoughts and feelings. People learn to openly communicate instead of run away, deflect, manipulate, avoid, deny and blame everything other than themselves. Sure, there are always hiccups that occasionally surface, but two people who unconditionally cherish their partner, those who thoughtfully support one another, even if they do not particularly like the other person at the moment, do so because they care about their partner. Love is the foundation.
"Goodbye," is not always the answer, nor is it easy where love once existed or has gradually transformed into emptiness, those who deeply and authentically love often stand tall and fight for what they value. However, when the road once traveled becomes made for one and personal self-worth and value are disregarded and or become less valuable to either person, wise decisions are necessary in order to maintain optimal health and quality of life.
When we give ourselves to others in the most vulnerable, honest, open and authentic ways possible, we either run the risk of being cherished beyond comprehension or being deeply hurt. The best thing about loving and respecting ourselves, knowing our value and honoring ourselves at a core level, is that we're always okay with or without someone; regardless of how challenging it may temporarily feel at any given time. The beauty of living in love, is knowing love. Feeling the experience, sharing it, regardless of how long or short the experience. Knowing that deep love exists, is one of the most beautiful experiences we humans can share with another person. Sometimes, we're lucky enough to find the love of our life early in life, others wait a lifetime. Sometimes we lose the love of our life and never love again, while others discover true love again. Get back up, it only hurts until it doesn't. This life is short, love as though today is your last day, it very well could be. Make it count.